This page is a transcript for Sheep-Shifting. Please add only the transcript to the contents of this page.

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(At Davenport Tower in the penthouse, Kaz and Oliver are sitting at a table...)

Oliver: Okay, the timer is set. Nothing better than pranking new victims on Halloween.

Kaz: This is perfect. Bree just did her hair and Chase has no sense of humor. What could possibly go wrong?

Oliver: They have no idea what's about to hit them.

Bree: So, are we just gonna pretend that we don't notice Kaz and Oliver plotting something over there?

Chase: It's easier that way. I'm not getting involved until something explodes.

(Skylar comes down and Oliver goes over to her.)

Oliver: Hey, Skylar. I just wanted to remind you about my standing offer for one romantic dinner, and that offer also applies to romantic lunch, breakfast, smoothie and other selectic beverages.

Skylar: Sure. How about dinner tonight?

Oliver: I get it. You're busy. I totally understand. (He walks off, but runs back.) Wait, did you just say yes?

Kaz: Oliver, you can't do dinner tonight. We have plans. Annual Halloween pranks. We've been doing them together since we were eight. (Points to Bree and Chase) New victims.

Skylar: Oh, I'm so sorry. I totally forgot that it was Halloween. We can do dinner tomoorrow.

Oliver: No. No, no, no. You already said yes. You can't take it back. We're doing this! (Runs to kitchen and gathers plates.) She said yes. All right, where do I begin? (The timer goes off and pumpkin explodes on him.) Hey, I still have a date with Skylar. Not even a nose full of pumpkin can change that.

(Intro plays)

. . .

(In Mission Command)

Kaz: (Runs in) Chase, help! I was flying around the city and I clipped a radio tower!

Chase: (Looks at him) You'll be fine.

Kaz: Oh come on! What gave it away?

Chase: Rubber arm, fake blood, and you have two left hands.

Kaz: (Takes rubber hand off) I'm not Oliver. All my pranks are lame. His recipe for fake blood is amazing, second only to his oozing "marshmallow pus."

Chase: (Chuckles) You two have a very odd relationship.

Kaz: Hey. Hey, you're smart. You want to help me pull off some pranks? I got my sights set on Bree. I'm thinking something in the realm of corn.

Chase: As fun as that sounds, and it doesn't, I got a lot of work to do. You remember when Roman and Riker blasted out our widows?

Kaz: Of course I remember. The glass got everywhere. I had to throw out a whole bowl of salsa.

Chase: Well, I was able to extract their DNA from the flash drive they left behind. If I can isolate the components of their shape-shifting power, I can replicate it and figure out a way to stop them from using it. Then we'll finally get rid of the biggest threat to superheroes this world has ever known.

Kaz: Mmm! But it's Halloween!

. . .

Perry: Aah!

Bree: What's goin' on, Perry?

Perry: It's Halloween! That means it's my turn to die! You may recall that I was a child actor on the hit TV show, "The Little Squirts".

Bree: Nope.

Perry: Well, I was. Here, I'll show you. The series was canceled after a horrible accident killed an actor on Halloween night.

Bree: Yeah, I really don't...

Perry: Every year since, one more member of the cast and crew had met an untimely fate on Halloween in ways that directly related to the show.

Bree: Again, Perry, I'm really not interest...

Perry: We once did an episode with a butcher, and ten years later, bam, my co-star Cindy McDoogal choked on a flank steak! Tonight I realized, I'm the last living cast member. I'm the last Squirt. Death is coming for me. I have to be ready for anything.

Bree: Well, I hope you're ready for this, because I'm kicking you out.

Perry: No! No, you can't!

Bree: Perry, relax, OK? You're not gonna die. I'm sure it's just a coincidence that 34 of your co-workers suffered horrible deaths on the same day every year. Yeah, you might be in trouble.

Perry: Which is why you're gonna protect me. I'm not leaving your side until this thing's over!

Bree: Whoa, OK. Run that by me again?

Perry: I have to wait until midnight until I'm in the clear, then I can go get candy! Come on. It'll be fun. Bree and Perry, hangin' out all night, doin' middle-age lady stuff.

Bree: Uh, I'm 17.

Perry: Really? Yikes! Time has not been kind to you.

. . .

Oliver: I'm sorry I'm so nervous. It's just whenever you look at me with those beautiful eyes, I... get all emotional. I agree, Skylar. I am the most handsome man in Centium City. Oh, wait, you got a little something on your... Oh, my. It's really happening, isn't it?

Skylar: Hey, Oliver.

Oliver: Uh! This isn't what it look... I was just... OK, you need to knock.

Skylar: What is all this?

Oliver: I'm just doing a practice dinner to make sure everything goes smoothly tonight, and good news, so far, you love everything.

. . .

Bree: OK, Perry, you seriously need to stop! You follow me every time I take a step.

Perry: Then take less steps. Aah! Popcorn!

Bree: Oh, relax. It is obviously just one of Kaz's lame pranks. You can see his shoes sticking out.

Kaz: Ohh. Worst Halloween ever. Hey, could one of you drizzle some butter on me? . . .

Kaz: Hey, Chase. You want to help me for a second?

Chase: Real busy here, Kaz. I don't have time for pranks.

Kaz: Oh, this isn't a prank. I'm actually stuck.

Chase: hold on.

Kaz: Yeah. Ow! Ow! Ow! (Groaning) Just get... Oh, you're going over the head. That makes more sense. Pfft! Oh! Thanks.

Chase: Mm-hmm.

Kaz: Man, I can't prank you, I can't prank Bree. The only ones left are Oliver and Skylar, but they know all my tricks. Halloween is ruined.

Chase: Well, you can stay down here with me.

Kaz: (Laughs) I'm not that desperate. How's your, uh, shape-shifty science thing going?

Chase: Great. I was able to successfully replicate Roman and Riker's powers into a serum.

Kaz: Oh, so it's ready?

Chase: Yeah, I think so. I'm just gonna go dig up some earthworms to try it on. I'll be right back.

Kaz: Who needs earthworms when you got this squirmy little guy right here? (Drinks serum and coughs) I'm assuming that's supposed to be injected, not swallowed.

. . .

(On the terrace)

Skylar: Dinner was delicious, Oliver. This is going much better than I expected. Although I'm not sure why she's here.

Oliver: Well, she was already wearing the dress, so I figured I'd invite her to dinner.

Skylar: You're cute. (Wind gusting) It's Roman and Riker!

Oliver: OK, I know they're supervillains, but even for them, this is cruel.

Kaz: Ow!

Skylar & Oliver: Kaz?

Kaz:Ha! Oh, you should have seen the look on your faces! Even the mannequin jumped! Chase made a shape-shifting serum. So all you have to do is think about what form you want to change into. Check it out.

Bree: Hi. I'm Bree. I smell like flowers.

Perry: Hi. I'm Perry, and I definitely don't smell like flowers.

Oliver: OK, big deal. Mr. Davenport's cybercloaks do the same thing.

Kaz: No, this is way better. I can turn into anything, not just people. Watch.


Oliver: Kaz, you're a sheep.

Skylar: Still less creepy than your mannequin friend.

Oliver: OK, fun's over. Switch back so Skylar and I can finish dinner. Now, I can't remember how long we were holding hands for, so we should probably just start that part over.

Chase: Well, I can see your evening is going as well as expected. Has anyone seen Kaz? I'm missing a vial of my shape-shifting serum.

Skylar: That's 'cause he drank it. He's right there.


Chase: What? He changed into a sheep?! No! No, no, no, no, no, no no!

Oliver: Why? What's wrong?

Chase: When Roman and Riker shape-shift supernaturally, they still think like Roman and Riker, but when Kaz changed into a sheep, he took on the mental capacity of a sheep! And a sheep has a very small mental capacity!

Skylar: Less than Kaz? That seems unlikely.

Oliver: Well, just change him back.

Chase: I can't. I haven't figured out how to do that yet.

Skylar: Wait. You mean Kaz could be stuck like this forever?

Chase: Well, no, not forever. Sheep have a very short lifespan.

Oliver: Okay, we have to find a way to turn Sheep Kaz back into Kaz.

Skylar: Do we have to right now? He's really cute!

Oliver: I got it! I'll... I'll show him a picture of real Kaz. Maybe that will jog his little sheep memory. Hey, buddy, this is you. No, pay no attention to the sweater. It's not wool, it's, uh... It's... it's polyester.


Oliver: Okay, it's not working. Why won't he turn back?

I don't know. Let's go down to Mission Command and try to find a way to reverse the serum.

Oliver: 'Kay.

Skylar: Kaz... stay.

. . .

Perry: And when Tilly Dobson fell off that ladder, down the mountain, and right onto that Chainsaw, I knew I was next. (Gasps) A sheep! This is it! This is how I'm gonna die!

Bree: Okay, that is ridiculous. Can I explain why there is a sheep in the living room? No, I-I can't. But... it's probably just another one of Kaz's stupid pranks. It does not mean it's here to kill you.

Perry: Just get rid of it before I do!

Bree: Okay. Fine. You poor thing. Come on, let's take you someplace safe before Kaz gets back.

Chase: Okay, this new serum should turn Sheep Kaz back into Kaz-Kaz.

Oliver: Kaz, you shapeshifted into Perry!

Perry: Oliver, you shapeshifted into an idiot!

Chase: (Laughing) Nope, that's all Perry.

Skylar: I have a question: What happened to the sheep that was here?

Perry: Oh, that? Yeah, it was here to kill me, so Bree took it to someplace it'd be appreciated. I'm guessing a slaughterhouse.

Skylar: What?!

Chase: Oh, no. I'd better call her.

. . .

Bree: Wow. Nothing says Halloween like a bunch of smelly farm animals. Hup. Hey, Chase, what's up?

Chase: Bree, where are you?

Bree: I am at the petting zoo.

Chase: Whatever you do, do not give away that sheep.

Bree: (Chuckles) Too late! I just swapped it for 20 bucks and a coupon for a hayride.

Chase: Well, you'd better get it back, because that sheep is Kaz!

Bree: What? Ew, seriously? I let him lick my hand. Okay, just hold on. Hi, um, if I ask for my sheep back, do I still get the hayride?

Chase: Okay, Bree's bringing the sheep back here.

Perry: That thing is coming back here? Well, I'm gonna barricade myself in Mission Command. I'll be safe there. No one on my TV show ever died in a high-tech control center. Wait... library, movie theater, bowling alley. Nope! I'm good!

Chase: And now she's gone. Win-win.

Oliver: Kaz, there you are. You okay? He... he looks pale to me. Does he look pale to you?

Skylar: He's a sheep.

Bree: Are you sure we can't keep him this way? I mean, until we can all at least get a nice sweater out of him?

Chase: Okay. There we go. All right, so, if the serum works, then Sheep Kaz should become... Then Sheep Kaz should become...! Then Sheep Kaz should become...!


Bree: Yay! We might all get sweaters after all! Whoo! . . .

Bree: Perry, are you down here?

Perry: Over here! I'm freaking out. It's almost midnight, so whatever's gonna happen is gonna happen soon. This is the only thing I could find to protect me.

Bree: Uh, there's a whole room of weapons and artillery, but, okay. Hey, you know what? How 'bout I make you a nice cup of tea to calm you down, okay?

Perry: Tea? Are you trying to kill me? My co-star, Phillip Damasio, died when he drank from a pot of tea while the water was still boiling. His insides melted! I heard the only thing left was his signature handlebar mustache, floating in a puddle of chamomile.

Bree: Handlebar mustache? I'll be right back.

(Panting and chuckling)

Perry: Who's this guy?

Bree: Uh, it's... it's Phillip Damasio. He's... he's alive and well and working at the Centium City petting zoo. What a coincidence! Here's 20 bucks. Just go with it.

Perry: Is it really you, Philly D?

Bree: Oh, yes, it is. See? Right age, right look, little handlebar mustache.

Perry: Wait. So you went from being a child star to working in a petting zoo? You're living the dream!

Bree: Hey, look, look! I-it's 12:01, see? You made it! You're alive!

Perry: That means you and I are the last two living squirts. It must be fate. Let's go grab a late-night dinner. Maybe we can rekindle our onscreen romance.

Bree: Just... here's 20 more.

Perry: I'm waiting!

Bree: All right, just take it all! Here. Just go. Go!

. . .

Chase: I can't believe my serum didn't work.

Oliver: This is awful. Kaz cannot be a sheep for the rest of his life. He owes me ten bucks!

Skylar: Wait. When I zapped the swarm thinking it was Roman and Riker, it changed Kaz back into his normal self. Maybe if I zap Sheep Kaz, it'll do the same thing.

Chase: That could work.

Oliver: Whoa, whoa, whoa. What if it doesn't? It could kill him?

Chase: That is true. Plus, the whole place would smell like burnt wool.

Skylar: It's our only option, Oliver.

Oliver: But... Fine. Hold on. Just in case it doesn't work out I have a few things I wanna say to Kaz first. (Walks over to sheep) (To Chase and Skylar) Could you give us some space? Hey, buddy, I'm sorry I wasn't there for you on Halloween. I should have rescheduled my date with Skylar. I mean, she and I are going to be together for the rest of our lives, so we'll have plenty of time for dinner later

Skylar: Run that by me again?

Oliver: No matter what happens now, you'll always be my best friend. But you do still owe me ten bucks. I love you, man. Don't get emotional, Kaz, you're gonna make me cry.

Kaz: Um... Oliver? Kaz. Kaz, you're not a sheep.

Chase: How is this possible?

Kaz: Well, the serum wore off while a 6-year-old was petting me.

. . .

Kaz: Well, don't stop.

. . .

Kaz: yeah, that kid's gonna be scarred for life.

Chase: Bree must have grabbed the wrong sheep.

Kaz: I-I'm sorry I ruined your guys' night.

Skylar: You didn't.

Kaz: Really?

Oliver: Really?

Skylar: Yeah. I mean, at least it was interesting. I was afraid you were gonna end it with some cheesy fireworks or something.


(Clears throat)

Oliver: Oliver to base: Cancel the show. I repeat, cancel the show.

. . .

Chase: What's up, Kaz?

Kaz: I just took the other sheep back to the petting zoo, and I'm pretty sure Perry has a new boyfriend. Yeah, some guy with a handlebar mustache. I saw them tandem-riding a donkey. Ugh. What are you up to?

Chase: Oh, I just got rid of my research. I can't crack shapeshifting. No matter what I did, my scientific methods only worked temporarily. Which is a good thing for you, or else you'd still be munching on hay right now.

Kaz: It's not that bad. It's all you can eat.

Chase: Well, I guess Roman and Riker's powers are still a mystery, so we're pretty much right back to where we started.

Kaz: Hey, don't sound so disappointed. I'm back to normal, although my feet are killing me.

Chase: Oliver! Get down here! Kaz is still part sheep!

Oliver's Voice: Hey, what's up, guys?

Chase: Oh, no! I just threw away all my research!


Oliver: Oh, it's good to have you back, buddy! (Chuckles)

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